Wednesday, April 25, 2012

They Can't All Be Winners (UPDATED)

Previously, on Sweet Sassyfats, I wrote about how my unhealthy obsession with Ghost Adventures has expanded my musical horizons. When Zak Bagans first announced that he was doing vocals for a new Lords of Acid song I was beyond psyched. Lords of Acid had its heyday in the 90s, but I somehow missed them back in the day. Probably because I was deep into my Alternative Rock phase, listening almost exclusively to whatever was playing on HFS. The heavily electronic acid music wave owed its success to the rave scene. Remember raves? Yeah, me neither. I never went to one. Hence my ignorance regarding Lords of Acid. But my loyal adherence to clicking on the various and sundry YouTube links that Zak posts on Twitter finally introduced me to this band. Better late than never, I suppose.

As Zak and Lords of Acid upped the hype for the new album Deep Chills, featuring Zak's song Paranormal Energy, on Twitter, I got more impatient to hear the song. After all, I like Lords of Acid, and I like what I've seen of Zak. His show keeps me entertained on Friday nights (because I have no social life), and his book got me interested in quantum physics, of all things. I just knew this song would become part of my permanent collection.

Back in the 90s, when I was unaware of how much I would some day come to love electronic music, I would frequently hear Good Ol' Pops say, "A function of expectation is disappointment." I usually heard this phrase in response to a demand for something expensive I really, really wanted and expected I would get simply because I was young and cute. My response was usually a sigh and an eyeroll, and the thought that Good Ol' Pops just didn't understand how much I needed whatever shiny thing I believed he should hand to me without question. Well I'm sad to report that Good Ol' Pops' words of wisdom came bubbling to the surface as I listened to Paranormal Energy the first time. Holy disappointment, Batman!!

I should have known early in the song that I would be disappointed; the intro just didn't grab me. "Ok, Sassyfats," I reassured myself. "So the intro isn't magical. But the song is gonna get really awesome really soon!" As I sat there, purple LG Optimus in hand, hot pink earbuds in place, anticipatory smile on my sweet sassyfat face, I eagerly awaited the lyrics to start. When they did, my anticipatory smile began to fade. My train of thought derailed quickly from, "Gonna be great!! Gonna be great!!!" to "Um, really? Are they sure this is the final cut?"

He must have heard it, too.
Unwilling to slap a THIS SUCKS label on the product of someone whose other works I respect and admire a great deal, I gave the song another listen. Maybe I just missed the awesome the first time around... Annnnd, Nope. Wasn't any better the second time. Or the third. (I was hoping it would grow on me. Don't judge.)

There is a silver lining on this cloud of dashed hopes: at least I hadn't downloaded the song. Since I'm in a perpetual state of ain't-got-no-moneyness, I found the song on YouTube instead of buying it from iTunes. Thank goodness I still have that $0.99 to use for something important - like 8 ounces of gas station coffee.

Zak is collaborating on a whole album with Praga Khan, the mastermind behind Lords of Acid. The two of them keep tweeting about how groundbreaking the album will be, and how much their fans are going to be blown away by its amazeballs awesomeness. After suffering this sad blow, I have no choice but to ignore Zak and Praga's tweeted directives to be all stoked and whatnot and await the final product with cautious optimism. Just because this song wasn't a winner, doesn't mean they all have to suck make my ears bleed be losers.

Right?

UPDATE: I listened to the song a few days later, it turns out I do kinda like it. It's not as fantabulous as I'd expected, but it's not as bad as it first sounded when my judgement was clouded by disappointment. Final verdict: DOESN'T SUCK. We'll leave it at that.

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